Remember Aaliyah Age Ain't Nothing But A Number?
That’s how I feel about the size of the garments in my closet. Being a boutique owner educates you quickly that all sizes do not match up. Example: Torrid’s size 18 fits different than Forever 21’s size 18. All manufactures/distributors use different size measurements. I hear so many stories about ladies cutting tags out of clothing because they had to buy a size up or refusing to purchase the size that fits because it doesn’t match a number in their head. A number on the scale or on a tag means nothing. Do you feel good? Are you healthy? Let it go! Please!
Recognize that your body is getting the job done
What are you telling yourself you hate? Your thighs? Your arms? Make peace with those body parts. Your legs are strong and allow you to walk. Your arms allow you to hug and lift. Start to appreciate the physicality of your body instead of picking it apart. Once I heard Ashley Graham say that she talks to her cellulite. She says, “I see you...and you are kicking...but I look good.”
Stop being so hard on yourself
Identify what your negative mental ticker tape is saying and address it. If you’re always beating yourself up about having gained ten pounds that realistically isn’t going anywhere until you put in the work, maybe just start to say it’s ok that it’s there but not for long! Change your ticker tape to the things you enjoy in life and try that on for a while.
Wear something on your “no” list
One of the other things I hear so often from women is that they tried something they never thought they could wear and ended up loving it. Whether it be shorts, colors, prints or miniskirts, many of us have adopted a "No I Can’t" attitude when it comes to clothing. Black only. Stretchy. Safe. But when you give yourself the opportunity to try new things, often time’s new found confidence can accompany it.
Keep it neutral
If you can’t write your body a love letter just yet, move toward body neutrality. What’s that? You don’t have to say anything overly positive about yourself (I love my thighs!) but don’t talk shit to yourself in the mirror either. "I like this dress, the colors are great." End the convo there.